Building And Keeping Marriages: Nurture Them – Don’t Quickly Separate

Yes, Don’t Just Separate Like The World!

Let’s return Faithfulness to Marriage and the Goodness of Family.

If you find yourself attracted to someone, immediately Nip things in the bud before things get out of hand. And try not to place yourself in temptation’s way.

Hi Friends, I came across an Article recently that was so ill-worded, it stirred me to write this Article. Her words were so misleading, so I’m choosing to write on a Topic I’d rather not usually.

She said to everyone who reads her Website that a person who is In Control can divorce quicker than a person who is Out of Control. Kind of like recommending it. And she chose a Professional Life of Lavish Wealth – trading her Marriage in for The Dollar, it seems.

Friends, to me that denotes a Life that is Out of Control, not In Control. aka “I shall just pack up my bags and my Kids and get the Life I Want” shall we?  By her forthright transparency, she is Recommending it to Others and I decided she has nothing to Teach Me about Health and Nutrition if she can’t Keep a Marriage Together – Promoting the Single Life and Wealth over her Family. She runs a “Professional” Natural Health Website with Specialised Recipes.

Sorry to say, I don’t want Memories of People like that around my Table when I sit down to Daily Meals – it would Upset me too much because my Dad opted to get up and Leave in his 40s and chose someone over my Mum when my Baby Sister was on the Way. Yes all a sudden things became a matter of “What he Wants” ………. he got up and went and the Marriage was Over.

Friends, so was the Family. It was the Second time he left in two years and when he divorced Mum, he divorced Me. I experienced a Full Swing Nervous Break Down at the delicate age of 14 and it was thought that I had Schizophrenia at first because I was So Very ILL. Needless to say “Do I recommend Divorce?” when “We Want what we Want?”………….No I Don’t.

I feel I must make a Stand here when addressing such matters and say “That’s the Way of Weaklings” not a Person with Strengths, when you are prepared to pack up your Kids and All or Leave Them, to Do Your Own Thing. It’s Very Selfish – Everyone has to Accommodate You because you are Out of Control, Not In Control. Indeed Not.

I really Feel for Kids who are experiencing or have experienced that kind of thing, and the Spouse who is Left in the Lurch. My Mum was a really Good Woman. She brought up her  Children while helping her husband Build Up his Business, and then comes the day when he Falls for Someone Else and takes off with that person, leaving her and the Kids with the Devastation of it all.

No Friends, that’s right, it Wasn’t Good. That’s saying “I don’t want God’s Way,  I want My Way” OR  “He won’t Mind” OR  “It’s All about Me Now”

No wonder it’s written in Scripture that “God hates Divorce”…… not because He’s mean but because of the damage it does, especially to Kids. He Sees it All – the Spouse’s and Kids trauma and upsets etc.

Can you See how that is So Wrong Friends? Without any Effort to Improve the Marriage with the One you once Loved, you decide to Get Up and Go, to follow  your Pipe Dream OR No Plans next and “The Kids will Cope” with your decision. You are in fact saying “Bother my Spouse, bother my Kids and bother God. I want Out” and that’s it.

And for some people, the thing is, how do you know you won’t repeat the Same Thing further along the Way – some do –  because you have not developed Strength of Character, that could have actually Saved your Marriage and Family?

YES. You could be one of those who are experiencing “Love is Better the Second Time around” with the Same Marriage Partner. Yes, believe it or not, over the last 1-2 decades, there are Christian Couples who decide to go His Way instead of Their Way and Experiencing Newness of Life – Kids included.

Now that denotes Strength of Character to me, or a Couple who are prepared to Find it. I really Commend Couples who are making Discoveries in this area of Life. Well done! I applaud You.

Should you choose the Other Way, how do you know – most times – you are not taking on someone else’s bag of troubles, if they have not made a Success of a Previous Marriage? And if both of you have escaped an “Unsatisfactory Marriage” what’s to guarantee you will find it this time?

Therefore, would it not be Wiser to approach a Better Marriage with the Partner you know well than a Person you don’t really know well?

Try doing some things as a Couple or Family Together in the Evenings instead of letting TV Soapies (Series) and Movies program your minds with Seduction and Dissatisfaction. Those Programs are full of suggestive content that eventually plays tricks on your mind and emotions. It’s so obvious when you see it for what it really is, but so subtle if you don’t!

A Marriage is like “A GARDEN” Friends. We get what we put into it and Keep investing in it and Working Together at it. It’s when you don’t do that things go wrong. It’s just like you fell in Love with a Flowering Garden and let it go to weeds, is it not? You find yourself saying “The Romance has gone out of it” without having put much into it, and so you find yourself settling for Plan B……be it the Single Life or Someone Else. Hey? But wait a minute, what if You could be the ones with a Marriage Restored in Jesus and Flourishing?

Discuss this with your Spouse – if you have problems or not – how you can tend to your Marriage like a Garden, weeding the things in each-other’s lives that are affecting your Relationship, Improving your Communications. Working at these things together: Sowing Good things like Goodness and Kindness etc; showing Interest in Each-Other’s Interest; Praying and Reading Scriptures together; Growing in your Love for Jesus and Each-Other; taking Interest in the Kids together.; maybe finding an Interest together and seeing the difference these things make. Keep Investing in your Marriage and Family – if you have problems or not. All the Best with that and be blessed!